Friday, August 27, 2010

Day 238: Yup, it gets worse!

As I mentioned in yesterday's post, I'm sure that the pain I am feeling is only going to get worse - and it has. 

However, here is why I am overjoyed at that fact:

The fact that I can feel pain in my lower body in and of itself is a good thing.  No, it's a great thing!  Any feeling, good or bad, is feeling.  That means the nerves are at least working, which is just what I need to happen.  The fact that the pain is getting worse only means I am getting more feeling back.  Even if they hurt, feeling my legs more could never be a bad thing.  It is positive progression, and that's the main goal.

I never thought I'd be overjoyed at the idea of feeling more pain, but it's the feeling that has me giddy, period.

I can remember when I would have given anything to just be able to wiggle my toes, and now I am walking every single day, and feeling more and more every day.  Who'd a thunk?

I don't often cry.  In fact, I could almost say I never cry if people and animals in my life didn't die.  Today, however, I broke down crying when I realized how far I've come in such a short period of time.  Tears of joy, of course. 

It's all just so overwhelming, and so unreal, sometimes I have to pinch myself and make sure it's not all just a dream.

Step count today:  549

Steps I'm ahead:  4,694

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